Today R2M brings you a story three years in the making. Melinda’s story is a great reminder to us all that God’s timing is perfect. Sometimes our struggles bring us pain but we always have the choice to allow our struggles to sharpen our character and build our strength. I am so proud of my friend Melinda for allowing God to increase her faith through three years of infertility. Thanks for being such a great example for me this spring as we learned how to give God control. I can’t wait to meet your precious baby boy. May you and Brian be filled with nothing but joy this January. -Traci
A message from Melinda:
“As I sit here and admire all the wonderful gifts that all of our friends and family have showered our precious baby boy with, I can’t help but fight back the tears knowing our dream is becoming a reality. The past eight months have honestly flown by and there are days I still question if I am really going to be holding my baby in a matter of weeks and if so, am I really ready?
My husband and I started our baby journey a little over three years ago. We would have never guessed we were about to go down one of the hardest roads either of us had ever been on. Everyone seemed to be getting pregnant and making it look so easy – mainly due to the happiness that social media brings – and we thought we would be one of them in a matter of months.
Unfortunately after a year of ‘casually’ trying to get pregnant, my doctor gave me a referral to see an infertility doctor just to make sure there wasn’t a reason we were unsuccessful in conceiving. I remember leaving the doctor that day and thinking ‘do we really need this, it’s only been a year and we haven’t really been trying.’ I hadn’t taken the extra measure of monitoring my temperature every morning to see when I was actually ovulating, or even taken the ovulation test to make sure the timing was right in general. It took us another six months before I was able to make the call to see an infertility specialist. In reality, I was putting off going to a doctor for the fear of the unknown as this was the first time in my life I truly felt like I wasn’t in control.
Now I can laugh at the fact I used to think I did have some control over my life but the truth is God is in control. He proved that to us in the next year and half as we faced four IUI’s and two IVF’s. There was no reason for my husband and I to be struggling with fertility medically but I do feel that God placed us down this road in order to cross paths with some of the most amazing individuals I could have imagined meeting as well as to grow our faith with Him and to make our relationship stronger.
This doesn’t mean there weren’t times of doubt and questioning God why this was happening to us. I have never encountered so many different emotions in my entire life. Every phase of the infertility process brought a new round of feelings, mainly frustrations, but thankfully God had led us to a new church family that ended up being our biggest support system. I didn’t realize when we were starting all the fertility testing that I didn’t have an out, I didn’t have someone I could talk to that could truly relate to all the feelings I was experiencing. I didn’t have someone to hold me accountable for my faith and to make sure I was really relying on God and putting all of my faith in him. I didn’t have that confidence that one way or another He would bring joy out of our situation.
It honestly took two and a half years for me to truly find that peace with God and to know that everything was going to work out as it should, even if it wasn’t how I pictured my life. It took coming down to our last two embryos and the fear of it being my potential last chance of getting pregnant to know ‘God’s got this’!
I will never forget those days leading up to our blood test to find out if we were going to have a baby. Once again, I didn’t have any symptoms of being pregnant which in the past led me instantly to doubt, yet this time was different. There are no words to express the feeling of God’s presence but He was there with me. He gave me the courage to take a pregnancy test even though my husband and I agreed that we wouldn’t take one to spare our emotions from either another negative test result or a false positive – due to the added hormones – but I had full faith in Him that this was our moment.
Thankfully I didn’t let doubt in. On a Wednesday afternoon we received a call from the doctor that we honestly didn’t think was ever going to happen. I could tell by the tone of the hello from the nurse God had blessed us with a little miracle. We were finally going to have a baby!
I’m thankful for my struggle because from it I have found strength in God as well as the importance to let others in and share my experiences. Each woman that was placed in my life that was going through struggles similar to mine, was placed in my life for a reason. I owe a lot to them for being so open to me and allowing me to see firsthand how they dealt with the tough times ahead of them. It allowed me to finally have the courage to speak openly about our baby journey and to hopefully be there for someone else who needs someone they can relate to. God is in control and He knows how to change your heart and focus if you just let Him in.”